The Picture and the Pockets
by Springtime Tuesday
Summary: The search for a certain photo turns out a lot better than Vince had expected.


_Disclaimer: I own nothing but the computer I typed this on._

_A/N: I tried writing a bit of Vince POV this time, because I have a mad love of writing Howard and need to expand a bit (Although Howard creeps in there too. And by creeps I mean dominates the first half :P). It feels a bit choppy to me, but I guess that's what its probably like in Vince's mind, so hopefully it works out. Enjoy :)_

"So, what do you think?" Vince asked, a dizzying smile spreading across his face. Howard glanced up from some very important poetry he had been writing, annoyed that Vince was distracting him again.

Now he was holding up a glossy photograph of himself and perfectly imitating the face he was making in the photo, which Howard found a bit creepy.

"Right, Vince I'm trying to write some world altering poetry here, aren't I? I don't need you distracting me with your shiny distractions." Okay, so that wasn't the most poetic thing he had ever said, but it was still a fairly accurate description because the picture was definitely shiny. And distracting. Very distracting in fact, Howard mused, looking at the photo for longer than was healthy he was sure.

Vince looked absolutely gorgeous in it, even the extremely straight Man of Action had to admit that. Vince smirked, seeing that Howard seemed to have lost himself in the picture. "See, that why I sometimes get caught up when I look in the mirror," he said. Howard went red, and his eyes darted quickly away. "Vanity is a dangerous thing Vince. I once had a cousin..."

"Ya, but I bet he wasn't as good lookin' as I am though," Vince interrupted.

Howard opened his mouth to deliver what promised to be a cutting comeback, but before he could reply a lost looking girl wandered into the shop. Howard suddenly snapped to attention, putting on his most welcoming voice.

"Hello m'lady. My name is Howard Moon, how can I be of service today?"

This onslaught of Moon Charm caused the girl to flinch violently and look a bit ill.

Howard still had it, yes sir. He watched her swoon slightly, and grinned widely.

Vince cocked an eyebrow as he watched Howard grin like a jack-o-lantern at the faint looking girl, who quite frankly looked terrified. He stood up and put his picture down on the chair he had just vacated. "You alright? You're looking a bit sick. Here, lets get ya some air," Vince smiled, taking the girl by the arm and escorting her outside. When he had sorted her out and sent her on her way he walked back into the shop. Howard was looking decidedly peeved.

"Why did you chase that young lady away? We were getting on quite well," he said sternly. "You almost made her faint Howard!" Vince squeaked out, looking at his friend with wide, disbelieving eyes. "That's the Howard Moon charm. Ow Chicka Chicka" he said, moving his hips in a way that did something strange to Vince's insides, and he wasn't quite sure whether it was a good or bad feeling.

"Whatever," Vince said, turning to his chair and finding it conspicuously empty. "Did you take my picture Howard?" he demanded, glaring over at the pink cheeks of his mate. "What would I want with that sparkly nightmare?" he asked, busily tiding off the nonexistent mess on the counter in front of him.

"I dunno do I, but your the only one who could have taken it."

"Check the floor, maybe it fell down?" Howard replied shiftily.

Vince bent down to look under the chair, and when he looked back Howard was gone. For someone who usually stomped about the place Howard could move pretty stealthily when he felt like it. Vince shrugged and wandered over to the mirror, fixing his hair and beaming at his own reflection. He'd deal with Howard later.

* * *

Vince had to channel all of his time living in the forest with Brian Ferry to sneak as stealthily as possible up to the mountain of brown topped with dirty looking smoke that stood before him.

What he was about to do could possibly get him killed.

Well, actually he didn't think Howard had it in him to kill. Yeah, he had some muscle if you bothered to look (which, Vince told himself, he didn't) but he was really a bit useless. No, Howard would probably just freak out that someone was touching him and accuse his best mate of perving on him.

'An' I'm not,' Vince reminded himself, continuing his stalk across the rug, his whole body tingling.

He was just going to have a little feel about in Howard's pockets, to see if he really did have his photo. Vince slowed down as he neared the jazzy mountain, which happened to be scatting quietly to itself, causing Vince to itch all over. 'I'd better not go all blotchy,' he thought to himself before getting into optimum pickpocket position.

This was gonna be great. In fact he had half convinced himself that he was a cockney bitch and Howard wouldn't even feel him nickin' his picture back.

"Skiddily bop WOW," Howard let out a girly scat scream as Vince's hand plunged clumsily into his front pocket and began rummaging about.

Finding nothing but lint, and taking into consideration the fact that Howard seemed to have frozen up in fear, Vince reached across with his other hand and plunged it into Howard's other pocket, keeping his first hand in place in the hopes that the less movement he made the less likely Howard was to unfreeze.

Feeling Vince pressed up against his back with both hands in his pockets was enough to prompt Howard into squeaking out a feeble "Vince?" At that moment Vince's fingers brushed a glossy piece of paper, which was unmistakably...

"I knew you took it!" he shouted triumphantly, doing a dance, which was decidedly awkward seeing as both of his hands were deep in the confines of Howard's pockets. He was about to whip the offending picture out with a flourish, when his brain cell finally caught on to the situation he was in. Although to be fair it had only been a few seconds and the cell was used to having at least a minute to process things. He suddenly realized that he was pressed against Howard's back in what he was sure would look like a loving embrace if anyone happened to walk into the room, he had just been practically grinding Howard in celebration finding his picture, and his hands were in a position that was both incredibly wrong, yet felt so incredibly good now that he had realized where they were.

Howard's awkward cough brought Vince back into focus.

"Right, yes. So I took it. Could you remove your hands now?"

Was it just him or was Howard's breathing a bit rough? Vince licked his lips. This could be interesting.

"Tell me why you took it and I will." Vince could almost hear Howard's incredulous expression, although where the word incredulous had come from he wasn't sure.

"I'm not..you can't..."Howard spluttered before grabbing Vince's arm and attempting to forcibly remove the offending appendages. Unfortunately for Howard Vince wasn't quite ready to give up the position he found himself in and wasn't willing to go down without a fight.

Or, more appropriately _was_ willing to go down, in order to fight.

Howard gasped as Vince's hands brushed over _that _and he lost his grip on Vince's arms as Vince's hands began to move in a glorious manner. Vince leaned forwards and whispered in Howard's ear, making sure to blow hot air on it. "Just tell me why you took it." His hands stopped moving to Howard's profound...relief...that was it.

"I just wanted to annoy you, you little titbox. Now let me go!" Vince frowned. That wasn't really the answer he had wanted, though it was the one he had expected. He drew his hands slowly, teasingly out of Howard's pockets as one last treat before everything exploded.

He readied himself for Howard to combust or to freak out and tell him he never wanted to see him again.

Howard swivelled around slowly.

Too slowly in Vince's opinion. People shouldn't be allowed to move that slow, it was too suspenseful.

Howard was facing him now the anger written all over his face. However, it flickered and disappeared as he took in the sight of Vince standing timidly before him.

"Oh sod it!"

And suddenly there was more brown in Vince's vision than he would normally be comfortable with and Howard's lips were pressed up against his. Vince melted just a little as Howard awkwardly slipped his tongue out to run along Vince's lips. He opened his mouth to draw it in and giggled a bit into the kiss as Howard started slightly. What had he expected to happen?

Vince pulled back and smiled up into his friends face. "I knew it!" he crowed triumphantly. Howard blushed and refused to look down at him, but Vince didn't let the lack of eye contact bother him, cuz after all it was Howard, and he had never really been one for eye contact.

"Do you want me Howard?" Vince said, his voice ringing with mirth.

"I knew you'd laugh at me." Howard looked a bit like he couldn't decide if he was angry or about to cry.

That look was well unattractive.

"Howard you batty crease, I'm not laughing at you. I want you too!" Vince practically sang. He couldn't help his laughter. He was happier now than that time he and Howard had danced about in ponchos and sombreros. And that had been a pretty rare bit of happiness.

Howard was now caught halfway between a happy grin, confusion and what Vince assumed was Howard's best attempt at a sexy face. That was even more disturbing than the first expression, so when Howard opened his mouth to reply Vince smooshed his face to Howard's in a really weird, wet kiss to put an end to whatever nonsense he had been about to spout.

A short time later Vince pulled away panting heavily. "Wow, Howard," he panted, not even sure Howard could hear him through the jazz trance type state he had fallen into. Howard's eyes slid back into focus and he smiled brightly.

"You little minx!" he said, his voice sounding much deeper and sexier than Vince had ever heard it. Vince could almost imagine that voice in some sort of cheesy, yet disturbingly sexy voice over for a commercial or something. He giggled to himself, letting that thought carry him down a road that led past Howard dressed as the crab of trapped wind to a left turn around which he was met will a whole hallway of Howards wearing all sorts of different costumes, a sight which was three parts disturbing, two parts sexy and ten parts hilarious.

He was only brought back to his senses when Howard's hand slipped into his, and he felt something glossy separating the bulk of their skin. Vince kissed Howard's cheek. "Tell you what, you can keep the picture...but you've gotta come with me first," he said with a smirk, his eyes flickering to their bedroom.

Howard seemed a bit nervous about that, and he let out a strangled giggle before seemingly getting himself back in control.

"Alright, I'll do anything to keep this picture," he said trying on a smirk of his own, which Vince actually found surprisingly sexy.

"Genius."

And with that Vince tugged Howard's hand and headed towards the bedroom, the photo floating slowly to the ground, where it lay forgotten for quite some time.

The End


End file.
